We sat in the waiting room @Westville Vet, it was early, after hours, & before the start of a brand, new day. Emergency consults were still in progress. Rosebud’s weak, body, fit snug & warm, into the crook of my neck, her loud purr vibrated strongly through the blanket. We had been in a few days before, as we knew Rosebud was terminal, Rosebud had terrible pkd ( polycystic kidney disease) a terrible genetic condition, which passes down from the parents to the kittens. We had faced the crossroad of whether to gently let her go, but Dr Smith & I, had opted to order in some special medication, that could potentialy buy us a bit more, time. Rosebud was, however, desperatly sick. I battled to sleep knowing how sick Rosebud was, frequent checks throughout the night, confirmed what i did not want to know & face, the hard, cold, reality was evident, we were not being granted more time. Heaven had announced the call. The rainbow bridge was ready. My silent inner crys, of, please no, meant nothing. I have been trained by so many, many, losses of rescue floofs in over a decade of full time work with just so many, that i know the call, for there is a distinct & set time, when there is nothing more, we can, humanly do. Very early, when i went through to do the final check, i knew for certain, its a final heartbreaking call, but you dig deep & you obey the call, for its always, whatevers best, for them, that are in our care. We sat in the waiting room, her snug & warm in my neck. Her hurting heart beat weakly against my hurting heart. Her sick, & suffering little body, clung to me, & I to her. The minutes ticked by heartlessly & cruely, this was our last, & final goodbye. I would walk out empty handed, on my own, without her. Tears will stream, it will be a blurry, hurting, empty, drive home. The car, offers a few moment of private deep grief, for then, you will need to dry the tears, pull yourself together, & go on, for the rescue floofs still here, need us. The nights will be hard, for when it is silent, we process more, & do the necessary work, of grieving, in order to heal. We have had so many losses recently, & all in such a short space, of time. It hurts. It hurts a lot. Truly, losing them, breaks your heart. Losing Rosebud was particularly hard, as her early death was completly preventable, at the breeding level. Truly so much heartache, could be prevented, however this responsibility, continues to lie solely, in the hands of the breeders. Dr Perling was on duty, that was deeply comforting, to me & to Rosie. Dr Perling knows our tribe, & her kindness & compassion meant a lot. Gently, we released this gently young beautiful rescue floof. Fly free, darling one. Tao is there, you will find him. Darling, gentle, Satin, too. Go find Jordy, our beloved boy, Jordy & you shared the same cottage, & he too, was called so recently, to the rainbow bridge, i know he, will be there, waiting at the rainbow bridge, to take you through. How deeply we loved you, Rosie. How deeply we will miss you, Rosie. I shall often look up to the night sky, as i so often do, & see the twinkling stars & know that you are there, along with so many of our beloved tribe. You were loved, & always, will be, darling Rosie, with an, everlasting, total, wholehearted & a forever, love. Run free beloved one. Rosie. Rosebud. Beloved, deeply loved, one. . Please help towards our medical costs for our Rosie, if you can.